Monday, December 16, 2013

Want your kids to tell you what's going on in their lives

Want your kids to tell you what's going on in their lives when they're fifteen? 
Start by making these commitments today.

1. Commit to dealing with your own issues. If you’re uncomfortable talking about your son’s birthmark or adoption, he will be also. If you've been struggling with your weight for years and your preteen is eating everything in sight and showing it, your conversations with her are guaranteed to backfire. Start by working through your own issues yourself so you'll be more able to help your kids with theirs. Get professional help if you need to.

2. Commit to a No Fault household. They’re more likely to tell you things if you start from a premise of compassion for all us, because we’re all human and we all make mistakes. Here’s a commitment that will change your life: Next time you find yourself automatically beginning to blame someone, stop. It’s a defense against feeling out of control, and against knowing that you had some role, however small, in creating the situation. Accept any responsibility you can – it’s good practice to overstate your responsibility – and then just accept the situation. You can come up with better solutions from a state of acceptance than a state of blame.

3. Commit to connecting with your kids when you’re with them. Most parents of teens will tell you they regret not talking more with their kids between the ages of eight and thirteen. They may have moved their kids along from homework to baths, or from church to soccer, but always assumed they’d have the deep discussions when their kids were a little older. But most parents are shocked to realize that teens have other priorities, and the opportunities for family discussion and parental influence dwindle unless you’ve made deep discussions a habit all along. How? Commit now to focusing on your kids when you’re with them, and put energy into creating real discussions.
4. Commit to habits of connection, such as not answering the phone when you’re talking with your kids, and using car rides to connect with each other. If you absolutely have to take the call, apologize and explain that it’s an exception. This may seem extreme, but you don’t take calls when you’re in an important meeting. Your goal is to give your kids the message that you really value talking with them. And if you can make yourself turn off the radio when your child gets in the car, you're lots more likely to make a connection with him and hear about what happened at band practice. Many parents swear by car rides to get their kids to talk with them, but it helps if you set the habit up early, rather than introducing distractions like radio and tapes with your preschoolers.

5. Commit to talking about anything and everything. This may seem obvious, but in most families there are some things that are off limits. Do you talk about people who have died? Your abortion when you were a teenager? Are your kids able to tell you when they do something wrong or make a big mistake? Can your eight year old ask you if you ever used drugs? Could your twelve year old tell you she’s uncomfortable with her budding body? Could your fifteen year old count on your support if he thought he might be gay? Could your 16 year old ask you about sexual pleasure? Whatever’s off limits, your children will sense the taboo, and it will limit what they’re willing to broach with you.

6. Commit to not letting little rifts build up. If something’s wrong between you, find a way to bring it up and work it through positively. Choosing to withdraw (except temporarily, strategically) when your child seems intent on driving you away is ALWAYS a mistake. Use the difficulties that come up to bring your family closer.

7. Commit to regulating your own emotions. The biggest hurdle to communication in most families is that when the topic is tense, we over-react. If you can regulate your own emotions, you'll find that your child is more willing to open up with you. Even with a subject that raises everyone's anxiety level, when we stay calm, our child is more likely to stay calm. Not only can we work together to come up with a solution that works for everyone, but our child is more likely to come to us next time there's a crisis.

8. Commit to spending time together. Regular family dinners, family game nights, picnics under the stars. Find times when you can turn off all technology and just be together. Enjoy each other. Wonder about each other's lives, interests, opinions. Great conversations have a way of happening once we focus on each other instead of screens.

Resource: Aha! Parenting

Sunday, December 15, 2013

Oh the weather outside is frightful

But Childeveloper is so delightful
And since you've no place to go
Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!



DOES YOUR CHILD HAVE AN EAR INFECTION? HOW TO TELL.

Your child has a bothersome cold for a week. Her nasal discharge turns a little green and her cough starts to keep you all up at night. Then one night she is up every hour extremely fussy with a fever. You take her into the doctor in the morning almost certain she has another ear infection.

Ear infections are one of the most worrisome illnesses for both parents and children to go through, especially if they frequently recur. They also are the most common reason for antibiotic prescriptions. Here’s a guide to help you understand why ear infections occur, how to best treat them, and most importantly, how you can prevent them from happening too often.

EIGHT MAIN SYMPTOMS OF AN EAR INFECTION
Your child may have 2 or more of these symptoms:

Cold symptoms – keep in mind that ear infections are almost always preceded by a cold. Often a clear runny nose will turn yellow or green before an ear infection sets in.

Fussiness during the day or night

Complaining of ear pain or hearing loss

Night-waking more frequently

Unwillingness to lie flat

Fever – usually low grade (101º – 102º); may not have a fever.
Sudden increase in fussiness during a cold

Ear drainage – if you see blood or pus draining out of the ear, then it is probably an infection with a ruptured eardrum. DON’T WORRY! These almost always heal just fine, and once the eardrum ruptures the pain subsides.

YOUR CHILD IS UNLIKELY TO HAVE AN EAR INFECTION IF:
1. No cold symptoms – if your child has some of the above symptoms but does not have a cold, an ear infection is less likely, unless your child has had an ear infection in the past without a cold.

2. Pulling at the ears or batting the ears in infants less than 1 year of age. Infants less than one are unable to precisely localize their ear pain. This means that they cannot tell that the pain is coming from the ear or from structures near the ear. Infants can pull on or bat at their ears for two other common reasons:

Teething – Baby thinks the pain from sore gums is coming from the ears

Because they like playing with their ears – Infants are fascinated with these strange appendages that are sticking out of the side of their head. They love to explore them, play with them, and especially to stick their finger into that strange hole in the middle.

3. No complaints of ear pain in a child who is old enough to tell you, usually by age two or three.

Delayed Speech & Language Development



Normal Speech & Language Development

It's important to discuss early speech and language development, as well as other developmental concerns, with your doctor at every routine well-child visit. It can be difficult to tell whether a child is just immature in his or her ability to communicate or has a problem that requires professional attention.


These developmental norms may provide clues:


Before 12 MonthsIt's important for kids this age to be watched for signs that they're using their voices to relate to their environment. Cooing and babbling are early stages of speech development. As babies get older (often around 9 months), they begin to string sounds together, incorporate the different tones of speech, and say words like "mama" and "dada" (without really understanding what those words mean).


Before 12 months of age, babies also should be attentive to sound and begin to recognize names of common objects (bottle, binky, etc.). Babies who watch intently but don't react to sound may be showing signs of hearing loss.


By 12 to 15 MonthsKids this age should have a wide range of speech sounds in their babbling (like p, b, m, d, or n), begin to imitate and approximate sounds and words modeled by family members, and typically say one or more words (not including "mama" and "dada") spontaneously. Nouns usually come first, like "baby" and "ball." Your child also should be able to understand and follow simple one-step directions ("Please give me the toy," etc.).


From 18 to 24 MonthsThough there is a lot of variability, most toddlers are saying about 20 words by 18 months and 50 or more words by the time they turn 2. By age 2, kids are starting to combine two words to make simple sentences, such as "baby crying" or "Daddy big." A 2-year-old should be able to identify common objects (in person and in pictures), points to eyes, ears, or nose when asked, and follow two-step commands ("Please pick up the toy and give it to me," for example).


From 2 to 3 YearsParents often see huge gains in their child's speech. Your toddler's vocabulary should increase (to too many words to count) and he or she should routinely combine three or more words into sentences.


Comprehension also should increase — by 3 years of age, a child should begin to understand what it means to "put it on the table" or "put it under the bed." Your child also should begin to identify colors and comprehend descriptive concepts (big versus little, for example).


The Difference Between Speech and LanguageSpeech and language are often confused, but there is a distinction between the two:


Speech is the verbal expression of language and includes articulation, which is the way sounds and words are formed.Language is much broader and refers to the entire system of expressing and receiving information in a way that's meaningful. It's understanding and being understood through communication — verbal, nonverbal, and written.Although problems in speech and language differ, they often overlap. A child with a language problem may be able to pronounce words well but be unable to put more than two words together. Another child's speech may be difficult to understand, but he or she may use words and phrases to express ideas. And another child may speak well but have difficulty following directions.


Warning Signs of a Possible ProblemIf you're concerned about your child's speech and language development, there are some things to watch for. An infant who isn't responding to sound or who isn't vocalizing is of particular concern.


Between 12 and 24 months, reasons for concern include a child who:


isn't using gestures, such as pointing or waving bye-bye, by 12 monthsprefers gestures over vocalizations to communicate at 18 monthshas trouble imitating sounds by 18 monthshas difficulty understanding simple verbal requestsSeek an evaluation if a child over 2 years old:


can only imitate speech or actions and doesn't produce words or phrases spontaneouslysays only certain sounds or words repeatedly and can't use oral language to communicate more than his or her immediate needscan't follow simple directionshas an unusual tone of voice (such as raspy or nasal sounding)is more difficult to understand than expected for his or her age. Parents and regular caregivers should understand about half of a child's speech at 2 years and about three quarters at 3 years. By 4 years old, a child should be mostly understood, even by people who don't know the child.


Causes of Delayed Speech or LanguageMany things can cause delays in speech and language development. Speech delays in an otherwise normally developing child can sometimes be caused by oral impairments, like problems with the tongue or palate (the roof of the mouth). A short frenulum (the fold beneath the tongue) can limit tongue movement for speech production.


Many kids with speech delays have oral-motor problems, meaning there's inefficient communication in the areas of the brain responsible for speech production. The child encounters difficulty using and coordinating the lips, tongue, and jaw to produce speech sounds. Speech may be the only problem or may be accompanied by other oral-motor problems such as feeding difficulties. A speech delay may also be a part of (instead of indicate) a more "global" (or general) developmental delay.


Hearing problems are also commonly related to delayed speech, which is why a child's hearing should be tested by an audiologist whenever there's a speech concern. A child who has trouble hearing may have trouble articulating as well as understanding, imitating, and using language.


Ear infections, especially chronic infections, can affect hearing ability. Simple ear infections that have been adequately treated, though, should have no effect on speech. And, as long as there is normal hearing in at least one ear, speech and language will develop normally.


What Speech-Language Pathologists DoIf you or your doctor suspect that your child has a problem, early evaluation by a speech-language pathologist is crucial. Of course, if there turns out to be no problem after all, an evaluation can ease your fears.


Although you can seek out a speech-language pathologist on your own, your primary care doctor can refer you to one.


In conducting an evaluation, a speech-language pathologist will look at a child's speech and language skills within the context of total development. Besides observing your child, the speech-language pathologist will conduct standardized tests and scales, and look for milestones in speech and language development.


The speech-language pathologist will also assess:


what your child understands (called receptive language)what your child can say (called expressive language)if your child is attempting to communicate in other ways, such as pointing, head shaking, gesturing, etc.sound development and clarity of speech.your child's oral-motor status (how a child's mouth, tongue, palate, etc., work together for speech as well as eating and swallowing)If the speech-language pathologist finds that your child needs speech therapy, your involvement will be very important. You can observe therapy sessions and learn to participate in the process. The speech therapist will show you how you can work with your child at home to improve speech and language skills.


Evaluation by a speech-language pathologist may find that your expectations are simply too high. Educational materials that outline developmental stages and milestones may help you look at your child more realistically.


What Parents Can DoLike so many other things, speech development is a mixture of nature and nurture. Genetic makeup will, in part, determine intelligence and speech and language development. However, a lot of it depends on environment. Is a child adequately stimulated at home or at childcare? Are there opportunities for communication exchange and participation? What kind of feedback does the child get?


When speech, language, hearing, or developmental problems do exist, early intervention can provide the help a child needs. And when you have a better understanding of why your child isn't talking, you can learn ways to encourage speech development.


Here are a few general tips to use at home:


Spend a lot of time communicating with your child, even during infancy — talk, sing, and encourage imitation of sounds and gestures.Read to your child, starting as early as 6 months. You don't have to finish a whole book, but look for age-appropriate soft or board books or picture books that encourage kids to look while you name the pictures. Try starting with a classic book (such as Pat the Bunny, in which your child imitates the patting motion) or books with textures that kids can touch. Later, let your child point to recognizable pictures and try to name them. Then move on to nursery rhymes, which have rhythmic appeal. Progress to predictable books (such as Brown Bear, Brown Bear) that let kids anticipate what happens. Your little one may even start to memorize favorite stories.Use everyday situations to reinforce your child's speech and language. In other words, talk your way through the day. For example, name foods at the grocery store, explain what you're doing as you cook a meal or clean a room, point out objects around the house, and as you drive, point out sounds you hear. Ask questions and acknowledge your child's responses (even when they're hard to understand). Keep things simple, but never use "baby talk."Whatever your child's age, recognizing and treating problems early on is the best approach to help with speech and language delays. With proper therapy and time, your child will likely be better able to communicate with you and the rest of the world.


Infant-Teen Parenting Advice

Whether you're looking for general information related to child health or for more specific guidance on parenting issues, you've come to the right place.

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Ten Tips for Shopping with Children

1. Remember that children have limits.
If you are shopping with children, be alert to their needs: are they tired, hungry, overexcited by the noise and confusion, or simply in need of fresh air and exercise, or a reassuring hug?

2. Remember that children are naturally curious.
Children are naturally curious; this is how they learn about the world around them. If they want to examine an attractive item, please don't scold them. Instead, help them to hold the item safely, or let them know that it can be viewed but not touched. You might say "This is breakable, so let's just look at it together." Even if an item cannot be purchased, it can be helpful to share the child's enthusiasm and interest in it.

3. Shopping with infants...
Shopping with an infant will be far easier if the trip is made after they are rested and have been fed. Babies and small children can become dehydrated in the dry air of shopping malls, so be sure to take frequent nursing or juice breaks.
Babies are almost always happier when carried. A sling or carrier worn by the parent provides far more comfort and emotional security than a stroller or grocery cart. A small child-proof toy can help a baby to cope with the inevitably lessened attention from the parent, but remember to stop as often as possible and take a moment for gentle words, eye contact, and hugs.

4. Shopping with toddlers...
Toddlers can begin to be included in shopping decisions. Involving the child with questions such as "which of these peaches looks better to you?" can turn a boring, frustrating experience into a more pleasurable one, for both parent and child. Children of all ages enjoy and appreciate being able to make some of the product choices themselves. Bringing along juice, a favorite snack, and a well-loved picture book, or a newly-borrowed one from the library, can also be very helpful.
Being surrounded by a crowd of adults can be intimidating to small children, especially when stores are busy. Using a backpack can be one way of bringing toddlers up to a height where they are more contented. It can also prevent the common, frightening experience of losing a toddler in a crowd.

5. Shopping with older children...

An older child can be a great help in shopping, if approached in a spirit of fun and appreciation. If the parent brings along clipped-out pictures of food from the newspaper grocery ads, the child can help to locate the item. Children mature enough to shop by themselves can help shorten the trip by finding items alone, returning periodically to put items into the cart.

6. Avoid the crowds.
Shopping just before dinner, when stores are crowded, and parents and children are tired and hungry, can be very stressful. Try shopping in the morning or early afternoon on weekdays, or move dinner up and shop during the quiet early-evening time between 6 and 7 PM. When we can avoid the stress of crowded stores and long check-out lines, we can have more energy and creativity for responding to our child's needs.

7. The check-out lane can be a challenge...
Check-out lanes which have colorful, enticing gum and candy packages can be a real challenge, especially as they are encountered at the end of shopping, when both parent and child are most fatigued and hungry. Bringing a favorite healthful snack from home can allow an easy alternative: "That package looks pretty, but candy isn't very nutritious. Here's the oatmeal cookie and juice we brought." Shopping at stores which have "child-proof" check-outs without candy can be well worth a longer drive. If there is no local store with such a check-out, you might suggest this feature to a store manager, promising to shop regularly if this option is made available.

8. When you need to say "no"...
The most important part of saying "no" is conveying to the child that we are on his or her side, even if we can't satisfy all desires immediately. It might help to say, "That is nice, isn't it? Take a good look and when we get home, we'll add it to your wish list." As the educator John Holt once said, "There is no reason why we cannot say 'No' to children in just as kind a way as we say 'Yes'." And remember that smiles, hugs, and cuddles are all free!

9. If you reach your limit...
If you reach the limit of your patience and energy, try to show by example positive ways of handling anger and fatigue. You might try saying, "I'm starting to lose my patience. I think I need a break from shopping for a bit. Let's go outside for a few minutes so we can both get refreshed." Even a few moments of fresh air away from the crowds can make a big difference for both parent and child.

10. If your children reach their limit...
If, after trying some of the above suggestions, your children have simply reached the end of their ability to handle any more errands, please respect that. Shopping can wait; an exhausted, hungry, or overly-excited child cannot

Remember that all children behave as well as they are treated. A child who is regularly given our time, undivided attention, patience, and understanding will have more tolerance for a shopping trip - and any other challenging situation - than the child who must face stressful situations without this emotional support.

Resource: NCP


Childeveloper 2013


Fun indoor activities  


Large motor and the snow


Great for large motor development! LOVE this idea!
Go Tubing
Beach toys aren't just for sand. Have your kids sit in inner tubes and then race to the finish line using just their feet.

...parents mag


IT'S MORE THEN JUST A DINO TO HIM!


When we encourage divergent thinking, we help to maintain children's motivation and passion for in-depth learning. Encouraging children to keep on generating new ideas fosters their creative-thinking abilities.

Using blocks gives children a fantastic way of producing important muscle and hand eye coordination that even defines hand writing.
Creativity, should be open ended. Being creative will boost self esteem that connects with life long learning.

SO...Remember that Dinosaur he just made, came from his cognitive and fine motor abilities, It is more then just a Dino to him!